Well Being Program 8: Succeeding Better
Interactive Transcript
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Well being is something we all
desire. But staying healthy and feeling good
can be quite a challenge especially with the stresses
that pervade every aspect of our lives today.
Everyone is aware that regular exercise and
eating healthfully are two essential steps to well
being. In this series you'll learn
about a third step; relaxation.
that trigger your body's relaxation response.
You'll learn about the importance of deep
relaxation for reducing the harmful affects of
stress along with a series of easy to do relaxation
skills. And through our weekly questionnaire
you'll gain an awareness of how stress may be
affecting you. So get a paper and pencil ready
and join us as we take the next step
to well being.
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stress has secretly invaded almost every aspect
of our lives whether we were aware of it or
not.
of stress and learn how to manage it?
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In this last
program we're going to look at how stress affects the achievement of our
overall life goals.
help you recognize the effects of stress in important
areas of your life and you'll learn one more simple
exercise that can help you bring about change.
The Relaxation Institute in Toronto is
a pioneer in the teaching of relaxation skills
for stress management.
dreams of life that lay ahead of us; as unsophisticated
as these may have been these ideas often held
the seeds of what we still feel is most important for us to
have accomplished in our lives. In early adulthood
if we weren't swept up too soon into the rush of life these dreams
may have crystallized into aspirations and
life goals. How have you done?
How would those children and young adults you once were
feel if they could see you now? In other words how do you
feel about the way your life has turned out and what you're
accomplishing?
definition has a lot to do with well being and a sense of
self esteem. The
pressure to achieve our goals may add to our overall stress
levels but in laying out what we want to achieve we can
also define when we can relax knowing that we are on
our way. Far greater stress is
created by not being in control of our lives; then we
get caught up in the cycle of reaction that's inherent in the
stress mechanism. Setting realistic
priorities is an essential part of
stress management.
desire of most living things including
us and if we feel threatened
that becomes the number one priority.
Whatever that takes and that can be just managing to survive the
drive and the traffic or stay in the job
and not lose it--satisfy the boss and the
requirements of a job--regardless and
our other needs will tend to drop away.
We end up not doing up what we might really choose to
do if everything was ideal. We end up trying to survive
just to survive in the environment which is quite harsh
and unfriendly in many ways of course and
so we forget about the things that are healthy for us and
the things that we would really enjoy and
would really be neutering.
to do this and do that and going here and having
every minute of your day planned out did not allow
me to sit back and think
what do I really want?
way too quickly and
I had
--probably because of that--I had lost the
awareness of some of the things that are
important in life.
to do next; what am I going to do today" there isn't any
space. If we create that space say by doing a relaxation
exercise for twenty minutes there's an opportunity
for long buried ideas
or plans or emotions to come to the
surface and they often do.
That can be painful but it can also be
very, very rewarding and
helpful and give us a new insight
--or different perspective--
on just how we're spending our time and we can ask ourselves, "Is that what I
want to be doing or have I forgotten that I really wanted to be
doing something else?"
is one of the most underestimated and underused tools
in being able to fight back against the stresses in our busy
lives. When people find themselves stuck in old
habit patterns and old paradigms for example and they are not
being successful by their own yardstick I often find
that relaxation is a very useful way of helping them
break through some of those problems.
I simply mean choosing anyone of the modalities that we've seen here on this
program but finding something that works for you,
that will allow you to clear your mind of other distractions and
help you to focus in on a new mindset or a a new
paradigm or a new life goal that you've been trying to achieve.
When you can do that with clarity then you can visualize
what it's like for you to be in that situation.
You can imagine what it's going to taste like, what it's going to smell like,
what it's going to feel like; everything about achieving that goal that you're
trying to achieve.
goals or even develop new ones that might be
a very life enhancing and life
promoting kind of a way to be because
you could be out there doing those things, you'll be excited, you'll be
motivated. It changes the bodies chemistry to be like that.
us we need to know what we're doing about it every step of the way.
And if we're making good choices and we're learning how to relax and control
what's going on inside our bodies high levels of stress that might be
swirling in chaos around us don't need to spell
disaster at all. In fact it can enhance our lives, give us
greater memories, and improve our health and our
longevity all at the same time.
relaxation has a positive impact. I think I see those goals more
clearly and they become much more accessible
when I eliminate all of the
stressful events and situations that
took those goals away from me.
really played music for a long time--I was a guitar
player; professional guitar player prior to woking
in the Arts Management Business--but as a result
of the relaxation course I started to play a lot more
than I had for
two or three years and that felt
really great.
and you really hate to go in Monday mornings into the office
and you have a poor self image and you view yourself
as not being a success and you're unable to sleep and you're troubled
those are all very bad signals that won't show up on a typical
doctors examination or any other way. I think self evaluation
tests can be a very big help for most people because
they are so busy worrying about things around them that they never have
time to sit down and reflect upon themselves and that's the
real value of a self test. It forces them to think.
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a little more about the relationship between success
and well being. Wouldn't you say they are essentially the same
thing?
imagine total well being without feeling successful.
And by being successful I don't just mean financial
success--although that's obviously a part of it--if you set out to
be a successful wife and mother and even though you couldn't care less about
your career and you've achieved your goal the you're a
success. Success is something that's self defined; it's how you
feel about yourself and it's hard to imagine feeling
totally successful without enjoying a certain degree of well
being. We have a questionnaire
that will spotlight different aspects of well
being and it can provide a holistic perspective
examine your achievements and your estimation of
your success in various key areas of your life.
for pencil and paper.
have paper and pencil handy just think about the points as
they come up and relate them to your own life
and answer the questions within the context of
the last three months. Let's look at the first question:
"You awake each morning feeling refreshed
and energetic." If this was almost always
true for you within the last three months give yourself a three,
if it was often true give yourself a
two, if it was only sometimes true a
one, and if it was almost never true give yourself a
zero.
question: "Your body is flexible and full of
energy." Think about it; is it a three, a two,
a one, or a zero?
"Your body is a source of pleasure for you."
Is that true or not
so? "You think clearly and
effectively." Think about it.
"Your memory is good." Is that a three, a two,
a one, or a zero?
These questions deal with our body and how well it is
functioning. It's how we experience our body and our mind.
As we saw in the second program of the series
the physical state of our body is a very important indicator
of our overall well being. Now let's look at the next
question: "You enjoy regular exercise."
if it's almost never true give it a
zero or the numbers in between.
"You eat nutritious and well balanced meals."
Three, two, one, or
zero? "You don't
smoke."
"You avoid overuse of alcohol and drugs."
And again here when we're talking about drugs it's not just street
drugs but we're talking about even prescription drugs; even drugs like
ASA.
"
"You take good care of your teeth and the rest of your body." It seems
like something like seventy percent of people over the age of thirty-five have
gum disease so certainly it's worth mentioning
the importance of taking care of your teeth.
"You take time to relax and revitalize
yourself." Score it three, two,
one, or zero.
when we're talking about relaxation we're not talking about the kind of relaxation
that you think you get when you watch television or go for a walk after
dinner. We are talking about literally the shutting down of the
body's stress mechanism.
These questions of course deal with how you take care
of yourself; areas over which we have some kind of
personal control and you can see several of
these areas are among the major bulwarks against
disease. Let's look at the next question:
"You enjoy your family relationships."
Almost always, often,
sometimes, or almost never.
"You are happy with your balance of
work, leisure and family time."
Is it a three, two,
one, or zero? "You know
that other people care for you."
or zero. "You have good
reliable friendships."
"There are people in whom you
can confide." Almost always, often,
sometimes, or almost never.
"You contribute to the happiness and well being of
others." Almost always,
often, sometimes,
or almost never. These questions
deal with relationships and relationships are extremely
important to maintain an overall well being.
There is a whole body of literature that talks about
how the support we get from our relationships really are
essential to maintain overall well being. I think it was Matthew
Arnold who said, "No man is an island."
"You are satisfied with your financial situation."
Almost always, often,
sometimes, or almost never.
"You feel you can get what you want
out of life." Is that a three,
a two, a one, or a zero?
"You are happy with the way your
life is going."
"You feel that you are responsible for the way
your life has turned out." Take a moment and think about that.
Is that almost always true, often,
sometimes, or almost never?
"You have control over the
important aspects of your life." Three,
two, one,
or zero? And these questions
of course deal with control and control
is a very important aspect of well being.
that the more control you experience in your immediate
environment the healthier you're going to be. Most people
think that the people at the highest end of the pecking order
in organizations would have the most
stress symptoms but in fact the reverse is
true; they find that the people at the lower ends of
the pecking order have more stress related systems. For example
secretaries,
word processing operators, labors, waitresses, lab
technicians have among the highest degree
of stress related symptoms because they have the least
control over setting their own personal agendas. And this is
not just true in the work environment, this is true in all
aspects of life.
"You are working towards
your life goals." Almost always,
often, sometimes,
or almost never. "You are living
up to your life's goals, aspirations or dreams."
Take a moment; are you a three, a
two, a one, or a zero?
"You enjoy your
work." Almost always,
often, sometimes,
or almost never.
"You can see how your work contributes to society."
Is that a three, two,
one, or zero?
"You are pleased with your level
of success and recognition."
These questions look at our life and career
goals. If we achieve our goals in our career
and work especially in this culture we tend to feel
successful; when we miss the mark we tend to feel
stressed.
motivate us and they spur us on to achievements.
As the Koran says, "If you don't know where you're
going any road will get you there." Let's look at the next
group of questions: "You are
satisfied with your personal growth and development."
Three, two,
one, or zero.
"You enjoy life and you look forward to your
future." Is that almost always true,
often, sometimes, or almost never
true? "You never feel bored."
Is that a three, a two, a one, or a zero?
"You express your creative
abilities." Think about that; is that almost always
true or almost never true?
"You are satisfied with your spiritual
development." Almost always,
or almost never, or
somewhere in between?
compromise your integrity." Is that a three,
a two, a one, or a zero?
This last section deals with your personal development;
it measures the richness of your inner life and
your personal strength both of which are necessary components
of well being.
good. It was straightforward and I didn't have any trouble understanding
any of the questions. In fact I was able to add up my scores
as we went along and I got a seventy-
two.
perfect score would be ninety-nine; if you had a three in each one of the questions
you could get a ninety-nine. Anything over seventy-five
indicates that you're experiencing a high
degree of well being. Between fifty and
seventy-five indicates that you exercise some self care
but there are deficiencies; there are areas that you need to look at.
If you scored between twenty-five and fifty
it indicates that you're not experiencing a whole lot of well
being in your life and you may really want to look into
a program that could help you to enhance your overall
well being. If you scored under twenty-five then
it indicates that there are really serious difficulties and that you might
want to seek professional help.
of my points in specific groups. For example the one
on taking care of yourself; what this questionnaire
is telling me is that I should exercise more,
eat nutritious, well balanced meals a little more often,
and take time out to relax and
revitalize myself.
to indicate for you those areas that you could
really build and enhance and strengthen your
well being. And of course this is just one
indicator of stress; it doesn't deal with the major
changes. In fact each of these programs--for those of you who
aren't familiar with the series--each of these programs deals
with a different aspect of stress and
I would recommend that you might want to get the home study
package that lists all of the tests and you get a real
overview of how well you are dealing with the well being
in different aspects of your life.
of exercise through the seven previous programs in the series.
You've shown us deep breathing exercises,
you've shown us tension exercises, and you've shown
us mental focusing exercises; for the last
episode in the series what would you like to show us?
practical, extremely easy and it's not a relaxation
exercise although it can be used as a relaxation exercise.
But this is really an exercise that enhances or
that can be added upon the
relaxed state. I mean basically the other techniques help us
to get into a relaxed state; the exercise that we're going to do today
is called Visualization or
Mental Rehearsal.
what it involves is your rehearsing
the successful achievement of your goal before you
have it. It's basically a skill that's being used by
Olympic athletes or being used in various forms of
cancer treatment where people actually imagine
--for example in cancer--that they imagine that their bodies immune
system is fighting back and destroying the cancers or
in athletics people actually imagine themselves
and rehearse in their mind over and over again their breaking
through to higher levels of achievement.
brains cannot tell the difference between what is
real and what we imagine and
there is an ideal state in which to work with these skills. When you
are in a deeply relaxed state--and that can happen as a
result of doing these exercises or relaxation
exercise or it can be just as a result
of just falling off to sleep so it's an ideal time to
do it as well. When you are falling off to sleep, when you
wake up in the morning first thing or in a deeply relaxed state your
brain waves shift and it's an optimal time to
literally put these new programs into your bio-computer if you
will. And basically it involves you're just
thinking about what you want to achieve; you rehearse
it in your mind before you have it. Do you have a particular
goal that you would like to work to achieve?
lose some weight.
weight that you'd like to achieve.
actually the one we learned in program six--the
three to one and the ten to one--to get you into the right state and then
I'll guide you through the visualization.
and for those of you at home you get much more out of this program by
actually doing the exercise with us rather than just watching
so follow along with us.
by taking a deep breath,
hold it, imagine the number
three, and then as you breath out let your whole body
relax; just let go. Let go of all the physical tensions, all the
tightness, relax your facial muscles, your
jaw, your lips, your tongue. Relax your
neck and shoulders, arms and hands,
your chest and stomach.
Let your body just breathe itself; just
let go of tightness.
hold it, imagine the number
two, and then as you breathe out just let
your mind relax; let your mind become clear, and calm, and
peaceful, and tranquil.
Take another deep breath,
hold it for a moment,
imagine the number one, and then as you breathe
out just let go; let your emotions relax and just allow
yourself to dissolve to a nice comfortable warm
pleasant state of relaxation.
I'm going to count now from ten down to
one; as the numbers descend just allow yourself to
become twice as relaxed as you were at the previous
number. When you get to the number one you will be more relaxed than you've ever
been.
Ten,
just allow yourself to become twice as relaxed as we move down to
nine. Twice
as relaxed again as we move to eight; just letting go.
You are going deeper and deeper into relaxation; seven.
Six,
five; going deeper and deeper
into relaxation. Four,
three,
two,
and one.
Just quickly scan your body and let go of any
tension. Pay particular attention to your
jaw and your neck and shoulders.
Just let the breathing happen naturally and let your body
breathe itself.
that you are walking down the
street and you're feeling excellent
and your body feels healthy and you feel in
balance and you feel trim and
svelte. Imagine; see it from inside your own
body. You're looking through your own eyes; you're walking by a store
window and you look and you can see that you're
trim and you feel good and really allow
yourself to feel good as you imagine this. I mean create it in your
mind the way you want it to be. This is something you can
control. Focus your mind on
the objective that you want to achieve.
smell it, taste it and again don't worry
if you can't see pictures; if you can feel it
or just sense it or imagine it in some way that's
the key. Our brain can't tell the
difference between what we're imagining and what is
real. Imagine
walking down the street feeling trim and slim
and just at the weight that you want to be. And imagine
others coming up to you and acknowledging you and saying, "Hey
wow you look great." I mean imagine
it; create it in your mind the way a theater director
would create it. I mean this is something you have control
over. The more emotion you can put behind it the more powerful it
will be.
Imagine; think of situations that
would sort of reinforce your
goal.
of pants that has been in the closet for
ten years and suddenly you're back into them and you feel
good. Really allow yourself to feel good; emotions
drive this whole process.
Imagine
it, rehearse it, create it in your
mind; the more vividly you can do it the more
powerful it will be. I mean
imagine it; create the images in your own mind. the images
that speak to you.
Okay now take a deep breath,
hold it,
exhale,
and very slowly--and you're doing this at home--just
slowly open your eyes. Take a half a minute or so and just little bit
by little bit just slowly, slowly, slowly
open your eyes. Little bit by little
bit by little
bit.
expect instant miracles--again don't
preclude them--but realize this is part of a
process that can help you to focus your intention. The
difference of the focusing of intention and unfocused intention
is the difference between a laser and
an incandescent bulb; they both give off the same energy
but when it's focused that laser can go right through
steel. In the same way we can use
our--focus--our intentions in most dramatic ways
using tools like the relaxation and the
visualization.
from now on Eli and I think that a lot of people at home will
too. Thanks very much.
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desire. But staying healthy and feeling good
can be quite a challenge especially with the stresses
that pervade every aspect of our lives today.
Everyone is aware that regular exercise and
eating healthfully are two essential steps to well
being. In this series you'll learn
about a third step; relaxation.
Not just sitting around but some specific activities
that trigger your body's relaxation response.
You'll learn about the importance of deep
relaxation for reducing the harmful affects of
stress along with a series of easy to do relaxation
skills. And through our weekly questionnaire
you'll gain an awareness of how stress may be
affecting you. So get a paper and pencil ready
and join us as we take the next step
to well being.
[music]
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Over the series we've seen how
stress has secretly invaded almost every aspect
of our lives whether we were aware of it or
not.
Deepak: How might our lives change if we become aware of the affects
of stress and learn how to manage it?
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In this last
program we're going to look at how stress affects the achievement of our
overall life goals.
Our final questionnaire will
help you recognize the effects of stress in important
areas of your life and you'll learn one more simple
exercise that can help you bring about change.
Eli Bay, director of
The Relaxation Institute in Toronto is
a pioneer in the teaching of relaxation skills
for stress management.
Eli: In childhood most of us had
dreams of life that lay ahead of us; as unsophisticated
as these may have been these ideas often held
the seeds of what we still feel is most important for us to
have accomplished in our lives. In early adulthood
if we weren't swept up too soon into the rush of life these dreams
may have crystallized into aspirations and
life goals. How have you done?
How would those children and young adults you once were
feel if they could see you now? In other words how do you
feel about the way your life has turned out and what you're
accomplishing?
A feeling of success according to your own
definition has a lot to do with well being and a sense of
self esteem. The
pressure to achieve our goals may add to our overall stress
levels but in laying out what we want to achieve we can
also define when we can relax knowing that we are on
our way. Far greater stress is
created by not being in control of our lives; then we
get caught up in the cycle of reaction that's inherent in the
stress mechanism. Setting realistic
priorities is an essential part of
stress management.
Dr. Cunningham: Survival is the primary
desire of most living things including
us and if we feel threatened
that becomes the number one priority.
Whatever that takes and that can be just managing to survive the
drive and the traffic or stay in the job
and not lose it--satisfy the boss and the
requirements of a job--regardless and
our other needs will tend to drop away.
We end up not doing up what we might really choose to
do if everything was ideal. We end up trying to survive
just to survive in the environment which is quite harsh
and unfriendly in many ways of course and
so we forget about the things that are healthy for us and
the things that we would really enjoy and
would really be neutering.
Sheila: The stresses of life and having
to do this and do that and going here and having
every minute of your day planned out did not allow
me to sit back and think
what do I really want?
Paul: I was going through my life
way too quickly and
I had
--probably because of that--I had lost the
awareness of some of the things that are
important in life.
Dr. Cunningham: So as soon as your feet hit the floor in the morning you're thinking, "what am I going
to do next; what am I going to do today" there isn't any
space. If we create that space say by doing a relaxation
exercise for twenty minutes there's an opportunity
for long buried ideas
or plans or emotions to come to the
surface and they often do.
That can be painful but it can also be
very, very rewarding and
helpful and give us a new insight
--or different perspective--
on just how we're spending our time and we can ask ourselves, "Is that what I
want to be doing or have I forgotten that I really wanted to be
doing something else?"
Dr. Hanson: I've always found that relaxation
is one of the most underestimated and underused tools
in being able to fight back against the stresses in our busy
lives. When people find themselves stuck in old
habit patterns and old paradigms for example and they are not
being successful by their own yardstick I often find
that relaxation is a very useful way of helping them
break through some of those problems.
By relaxation
I simply mean choosing anyone of the modalities that we've seen here on this
program but finding something that works for you,
that will allow you to clear your mind of other distractions and
help you to focus in on a new mindset or a a new
paradigm or a new life goal that you've been trying to achieve.
When you can do that with clarity then you can visualize
what it's like for you to be in that situation.
You can imagine what it's going to taste like, what it's going to smell like,
what it's going to feel like; everything about achieving that goal that you're
trying to achieve.
Dr. Cunningham: If you can re-interest yourself in your
goals or even develop new ones that might be
a very life enhancing and life
promoting kind of a way to be because
you could be out there doing those things, you'll be excited, you'll be
motivated. It changes the bodies chemistry to be like that.
Dr. Hanson: So we need to know more than just the amount of stress that's around
us we need to know what we're doing about it every step of the way.
And if we're making good choices and we're learning how to relax and control
what's going on inside our bodies high levels of stress that might be
swirling in chaos around us don't need to spell
disaster at all. In fact it can enhance our lives, give us
greater memories, and improve our health and our
longevity all at the same time.
Sheila: I think
relaxation has a positive impact. I think I see those goals more
clearly and they become much more accessible
when I eliminate all of the
stressful events and situations that
took those goals away from me.
Paul: Interestingly enough I hadn't
really played music for a long time--I was a guitar
player; professional guitar player prior to woking
in the Arts Management Business--but as a result
of the relaxation course I started to play a lot more
than I had for
two or three years and that felt
really great.
Dr. Hanson: If you're not feeling good about yourself
and you really hate to go in Monday mornings into the office
and you have a poor self image and you view yourself
as not being a success and you're unable to sleep and you're troubled
those are all very bad signals that won't show up on a typical
doctors examination or any other way. I think self evaluation
tests can be a very big help for most people because
they are so busy worrying about things around them that they never have
time to sit down and reflect upon themselves and that's the
real value of a self test. It forces them to think.
[silence]
Deepak: Eli before we get into the self test I'd like to explore
a little more about the relationship between success
and well being. Wouldn't you say they are essentially the same
thing?
Eli: That's an interesting point. It's hard to
imagine total well being without feeling successful.
And by being successful I don't just mean financial
success--although that's obviously a part of it--if you set out to
be a successful wife and mother and even though you couldn't care less about
your career and you've achieved your goal the you're a
success. Success is something that's self defined; it's how you
feel about yourself and it's hard to imagine feeling
totally successful without enjoying a certain degree of well
being. We have a questionnaire
that will spotlight different aspects of well
being and it can provide a holistic perspective
examine your achievements and your estimation of
your success in various key areas of your life.
Deepak: So it's time
for pencil and paper.
Eli: Yes and don't worry if you don't
have paper and pencil handy just think about the points as
they come up and relate them to your own life
and answer the questions within the context of
the last three months. Let's look at the first question:
"You awake each morning feeling refreshed
and energetic." If this was almost always
true for you within the last three months give yourself a three,
if it was often true give yourself a
two, if it was only sometimes true a
one, and if it was almost never true give yourself a
zero.
Let's look at the next
question: "Your body is flexible and full of
energy." Think about it; is it a three, a two,
a one, or a zero?
"Your body is a source of pleasure for you."
Is that true or not
so? "You think clearly and
effectively." Think about it.
"Your memory is good." Is that a three, a two,
a one, or a zero?
These questions deal with our body and how well it is
functioning. It's how we experience our body and our mind.
As we saw in the second program of the series
the physical state of our body is a very important indicator
of our overall well being. Now let's look at the next
question: "You enjoy regular exercise."
Again if that's almost always true give it a three,
if it's almost never true give it a
zero or the numbers in between.
"You eat nutritious and well balanced meals."
Three, two, one, or
zero? "You don't
smoke."
"You avoid overuse of alcohol and drugs."
And again here when we're talking about drugs it's not just street
drugs but we're talking about even prescription drugs; even drugs like
ASA.
"
"You take good care of your teeth and the rest of your body." It seems
like something like seventy percent of people over the age of thirty-five have
gum disease so certainly it's worth mentioning
the importance of taking care of your teeth.
"You take time to relax and revitalize
yourself." Score it three, two,
one, or zero.
And again
when we're talking about relaxation we're not talking about the kind of relaxation
that you think you get when you watch television or go for a walk after
dinner. We are talking about literally the shutting down of the
body's stress mechanism.
These questions of course deal with how you take care
of yourself; areas over which we have some kind of
personal control and you can see several of
these areas are among the major bulwarks against
disease. Let's look at the next question:
"You enjoy your family relationships."
Almost always, often,
sometimes, or almost never.
"You are happy with your balance of
work, leisure and family time."
Is it a three, two,
one, or zero? "You know
that other people care for you."
Think about that; rate it three, two, one,
or zero. "You have good
reliable friendships."
"There are people in whom you
can confide." Almost always, often,
sometimes, or almost never.
"You contribute to the happiness and well being of
others." Almost always,
often, sometimes,
or almost never. These questions
deal with relationships and relationships are extremely
important to maintain an overall well being.
There is a whole body of literature that talks about
how the support we get from our relationships really are
essential to maintain overall well being. I think it was Matthew
Arnold who said, "No man is an island."
Let's look at the next group of questions:
"You are satisfied with your financial situation."
Almost always, often,
sometimes, or almost never.
"You feel you can get what you want
out of life." Is that a three,
a two, a one, or a zero?
"You are happy with the way your
life is going."
"You feel that you are responsible for the way
your life has turned out." Take a moment and think about that.
Is that almost always true, often,
sometimes, or almost never?
"You have control over the
important aspects of your life." Three,
two, one,
or zero? And these questions
of course deal with control and control
is a very important aspect of well being.
All the research is quite clear in demonstrating
that the more control you experience in your immediate
environment the healthier you're going to be. Most people
think that the people at the highest end of the pecking order
in organizations would have the most
stress symptoms but in fact the reverse is
true; they find that the people at the lower ends of
the pecking order have more stress related systems. For example
secretaries,
word processing operators, labors, waitresses, lab
technicians have among the highest degree
of stress related symptoms because they have the least
control over setting their own personal agendas. And this is
not just true in the work environment, this is true in all
aspects of life.
Let's look at the next question:
"You are working towards
your life goals." Almost always,
often, sometimes,
or almost never. "You are living
up to your life's goals, aspirations or dreams."
Take a moment; are you a three, a
two, a one, or a zero?
"You enjoy your
work." Almost always,
often, sometimes,
or almost never.
"You can see how your work contributes to society."
Is that a three, two,
one, or zero?
"You are pleased with your level
of success and recognition."
These questions look at our life and career
goals. If we achieve our goals in our career
and work especially in this culture we tend to feel
successful; when we miss the mark we tend to feel
stressed.
Having goals is extremely important; they
motivate us and they spur us on to achievements.
As the Koran says, "If you don't know where you're
going any road will get you there." Let's look at the next
group of questions: "You are
satisfied with your personal growth and development."
Three, two,
one, or zero.
"You enjoy life and you look forward to your
future." Is that almost always true,
often, sometimes, or almost never
true? "You never feel bored."
Is that a three, a two, a one, or a zero?
"You express your creative
abilities." Think about that; is that almost always
true or almost never true?
"You are satisfied with your spiritual
development." Almost always,
or almost never, or
somewhere in between?
And the very last question, "You do not
compromise your integrity." Is that a three,
a two, a one, or a zero?
This last section deals with your personal development;
it measures the richness of your inner life and
your personal strength both of which are necessary components
of well being.
Deepak: I found this test to be pretty
good. It was straightforward and I didn't have any trouble understanding
any of the questions. In fact I was able to add up my scores
as we went along and I got a seventy-
two.
Eli: That's good. Actually a
perfect score would be ninety-nine; if you had a three in each one of the questions
you could get a ninety-nine. Anything over seventy-five
indicates that you're experiencing a high
degree of well being. Between fifty and
seventy-five indicates that you exercise some self care
but there are deficiencies; there are areas that you need to look at.
If you scored between twenty-five and fifty
it indicates that you're not experiencing a whole lot of well
being in your life and you may really want to look into
a program that could help you to enhance your overall
well being. If you scored under twenty-five then
it indicates that there are really serious difficulties and that you might
want to seek professional help.
Deepak: I lost a lot
of my points in specific groups. For example the one
on taking care of yourself; what this questionnaire
is telling me is that I should exercise more,
eat nutritious, well balanced meals a little more often,
and take time out to relax and
revitalize myself.
Eli: Well that's the idea of this test; it's really
to indicate for you those areas that you could
really build and enhance and strengthen your
well being. And of course this is just one
indicator of stress; it doesn't deal with the major
changes. In fact each of these programs--for those of you who
aren't familiar with the series--each of these programs deals
with a different aspect of stress and
I would recommend that you might want to get the home study
package that lists all of the tests and you get a real
overview of how well you are dealing with the well being
in different aspects of your life.
Deepak: Eli you have shown us a number
of exercise through the seven previous programs in the series.
You've shown us deep breathing exercises,
you've shown us tension exercises, and you've shown
us mental focusing exercises; for the last
episode in the series what would you like to show us?
Eli: Well I want to show you an exercise that is extremely
practical, extremely easy and it's not a relaxation
exercise although it can be used as a relaxation exercise.
But this is really an exercise that enhances or
that can be added upon the
relaxed state. I mean basically the other techniques help us
to get into a relaxed state; the exercise that we're going to do today
is called Visualization or
Mental Rehearsal.
Basically
what it involves is your rehearsing
the successful achievement of your goal before you
have it. It's basically a skill that's being used by
Olympic athletes or being used in various forms of
cancer treatment where people actually imagine
--for example in cancer--that they imagine that their bodies immune
system is fighting back and destroying the cancers or
in athletics people actually imagine themselves
and rehearse in their mind over and over again their breaking
through to higher levels of achievement.
It seems that our
brains cannot tell the difference between what is
real and what we imagine and
there is an ideal state in which to work with these skills. When you
are in a deeply relaxed state--and that can happen as a
result of doing these exercises or relaxation
exercise or it can be just as a result
of just falling off to sleep so it's an ideal time to
do it as well. When you are falling off to sleep, when you
wake up in the morning first thing or in a deeply relaxed state your
brain waves shift and it's an optimal time to
literally put these new programs into your bio-computer if you
will. And basically it involves you're just
thinking about what you want to achieve; you rehearse
it in your mind before you have it. Do you have a particular
goal that you would like to work to achieve?
Deepak: Um huh; I'd like to
lose some weight.
Eli: Okay it's helpful to think of a specific
weight that you'd like to achieve.
Deepak: Uh huh; one hundred and sixty.
Eli: Okay would you like to do an exercise?
Deepak: Sure.
Eli: Okay first of all we're going to start with a relaxation exercise
actually the one we learned in program six--the
three to one and the ten to one--to get you into the right state and then
I'll guide you through the visualization.
Deepak: Okay.
Eli: Get comfortable in your chair, close your eyes,
and for those of you at home you get much more out of this program by
actually doing the exercise with us rather than just watching
so follow along with us.
Start
by taking a deep breath,
hold it, imagine the number
three, and then as you breath out let your whole body
relax; just let go. Let go of all the physical tensions, all the
tightness, relax your facial muscles, your
jaw, your lips, your tongue. Relax your
neck and shoulders, arms and hands,
your chest and stomach.
Let your body just breathe itself; just
let go of tightness.
Take another deep breath
hold it, imagine the number
two, and then as you breathe out just let
your mind relax; let your mind become clear, and calm, and
peaceful, and tranquil.
Take another deep breath,
hold it for a moment,
imagine the number one, and then as you breathe
out just let go; let your emotions relax and just allow
yourself to dissolve to a nice comfortable warm
pleasant state of relaxation.
I'm going to count now from ten down to
one; as the numbers descend just allow yourself to
become twice as relaxed as you were at the previous
number. When you get to the number one you will be more relaxed than you've ever
been.
Your mind will be alert and your body will be relaxed.
Ten,
just allow yourself to become twice as relaxed as we move down to
nine. Twice
as relaxed again as we move to eight; just letting go.
You are going deeper and deeper into relaxation; seven.
Six,
five; going deeper and deeper
into relaxation. Four,
three,
two,
and one.
Just quickly scan your body and let go of any
tension. Pay particular attention to your
jaw and your neck and shoulders.
Just let the breathing happen naturally and let your body
breathe itself.
Okay now I want you to imagine
that you are walking down the
street and you're feeling excellent
and your body feels healthy and you feel in
balance and you feel trim and
svelte. Imagine; see it from inside your own
body. You're looking through your own eyes; you're walking by a store
window and you look and you can see that you're
trim and you feel good and really allow
yourself to feel good as you imagine this. I mean create it in your
mind the way you want it to be. This is something you can
control. Focus your mind on
the objective that you want to achieve.
See it, hear it,
smell it, taste it and again don't worry
if you can't see pictures; if you can feel it
or just sense it or imagine it in some way that's
the key. Our brain can't tell the
difference between what we're imagining and what is
real. Imagine
walking down the street feeling trim and slim
and just at the weight that you want to be. And imagine
others coming up to you and acknowledging you and saying, "Hey
wow you look great." I mean imagine
it; create it in your mind the way a theater director
would create it. I mean this is something you have control
over. The more emotion you can put behind it the more powerful it
will be.
Imagine; think of situations that
would sort of reinforce your
goal.
You are getting into an old pair
of pants that has been in the closet for
ten years and suddenly you're back into them and you feel
good. Really allow yourself to feel good; emotions
drive this whole process.
Imagine
it, rehearse it, create it in your
mind; the more vividly you can do it the more
powerful it will be. I mean
imagine it; create the images in your own mind. the images
that speak to you.
Okay now take a deep breath,
hold it,
exhale,
and very slowly--and you're doing this at home--just
slowly open your eyes. Take a half a minute or so and just little bit
by little bit just slowly, slowly, slowly
open your eyes. Little bit by little
bit by little
bit.
Deepak: So am I losing weight?
Eli: Don't
expect instant miracles--again don't
preclude them--but realize this is part of a
process that can help you to focus your intention. The
difference of the focusing of intention and unfocused intention
is the difference between a laser and
an incandescent bulb; they both give off the same energy
but when it's focused that laser can go right through
steel. In the same way we can use
our--focus--our intentions in most dramatic ways
using tools like the relaxation and the
visualization.
Deepak: Well I'm certainly going to do these exercises
from now on Eli and I think that a lot of people at home will
too. Thanks very much.
Eli: Oh a pleasure.
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Program Length: 26:50 min
About the Program:
Program 8 Succeeding Better, sums up the series by looking at the importance of relaxation to all aspects of life in the context of your overall life goals, well being and success according to your own definition.